a good woman, just not a 10

[Gator]

Elen,

You are rocking and  rolling tonight!

No more questions, because as you said, to each his own.  You are not going to convince me to not pursue younger women.  I just hope you realize that I have other standards too, such as intellect, and if not satisfied I choose to live alone.  But I will keep trying.  Actually I have been very happy with the two RW in my life.  And both would very likely enjoy a chat with you, provided you did not judge them.  One is even in her 40s (as my AW friends say, "Bucky, she is almost age-appropriate").

To illustrate my overall thoughts, I start with something Lilly wrote earlier,

By appearance I mean everything that appears out of her  That would include not only body, face, hair, clothing, but also her demeanor, posture, manners, voice, conversation. She may still not make it to a 10, but a thourogh work on herself would definitely upgrade any woman in the looks department.

Lilly makes an excellent point that should not be lost among the talk about stari kozels, short piles of stench and blackheads (ugh!).   The point I wish to make is that a woman's charming ways attract me more than her face or body.  Most important is the ability to have fun and enjoy each other's company.  Nevertheless Elen, I still must feel physically attracted to her and (before you say it), she with me.  

And a man should take note of Lily's list as where he can work to improve himself.

[LEGAL]

still missing a point 
taking care about own look and taking participation in competiton for males with a help of look are different things Anyway to each her own.

Very simple example:

Two single women want to meet men of their dream.   They are of the same age and have the same levels of intellect but one woman is taking care about her look and other woman is not. Who has more chance?

To each her own. It is  a life.

Olga.

[Jazzyclassy]

     As many Western men as there are that want a hot young wife, there are just as many FSU women that want a rich husband of any age.                    

Sure none has any problem with those women and those men , just their majority grows for some reason , must be  something wrong with the sun it rotates somehow in different direction or something:P

those old men who admit that they are for young girls and those girls who are honestly telling that  they are searching for rich husbands - god bless them to find each other , nobody cares , just what irritates me the most that they have impudence to talk about high matters and about how family should be about great values and moral qualities and stability about true love and even give their advices and special methods how to meet rich old guy and how to attract young hot girl
this moral disintegration  strikes me all the time

Let those people do what they want if they are happy , just it would be preferable for them not to spread the things  into mass  what they call love and trust and ideal relations cos it would not be fully sincere......and they know that perfectly

that is just my point of view call it narrow minded , foolish , silly , stupid just how you like

Being here in this forum I probably wont be surprised with anything , it shook my basic understanding about relations, love, true feelings, people, turned  it upside down , but I got my core and it is firm

I think this woman should try and search her man in Russia .... why not

[Gator]

just what irritates me the most that they have impudence to talk about high matters and about how family should be about great values and moral qualities and stability about true love

I am confused.  Why would financial security and age gap prevent this?

Being here in this forum I probably wont be surprised with anything , it shook my basic understanding about relations, love, true feelings, people.

Honey pie, you are just beginning to learn about life.  Enjoy every day of the journey, keep your core values, be good to you man, and JUDGE NOT. 

I think this woman should try and search her man in Russia .... why not

 

You should help her try a new way as evidently her present plan is not working.  It would not take much effort.

[mspanky]

Jazzy,

 The norm in the U.S. is men are usually married to women close to their age. I took pictures of Hollywood actors who could have the youngest and most beautiful women around because they have fame and tens of millions.many probably have gorgeous women throwing themselves at them all the time. Yet they choose charecter and probably a woman they trust rather than eye candy., many big Hollywood men are marrried to women who are not 10's and close to their age.There were tons more examples, but you get the idea. many American men are not that shallow. Some actually seek substance before anything else.

patrick and Jillian Dempsey. Same age 40. She just gave birth to twins.married 6 or 7 years

http://www.greysanatomyinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/08/Patrick-Jillian-Dempsey.jpg



Matt damon and wife. She has an 8 year old daughter from previous union.

http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2006/06/13/mattdamonwife2_narrowweb__300x402,0.jpg


Sting and Trudy. She may actuallt be a bit older. Both in their 50's.

http://cdn.digitalcity.com/getty/E/2004-02-28/3025006.jpg

Ted Danson and wife. Both 50's married about 10 years.
http://cdn.channel.aol.com/getty/E/2004-01-11/2859649.jpg

Robin Williams and wife. Both 50's.

http://imdb.com/rg/photos-name/summary//gallery/granitz/5239/Events/5239/ss.jpg.html?
path=pgallery&path_key=Williams,%20Marsha%20Garces


andrea Aggasi and Steffi Graff, both late 30's
http://www.hola.com/galeria-de-imagenes.html?idioma=castellano&imagen=/famosos/2001/07/13/steffiembarazo/imgs/steffi-2a.jpg&fondonaveg=000033&seccion=famosos

Pierce Brosnan (james Bond and wife)

http://justjared.buzznet.com/2007/03/11/pierce-brosnan-sons/

[viking]

I went to school with Billy Crystal, the comedian, and have followed his career. Once when being interviewed on the Jay Leno show he was asked how come, with all the beautiful women he has co-starred with, he is still married to the same woman for almost 30 years. (And his wife is pretty but no beauty). His reply was, "you don't know my wife". Meaning he found a woman who means everything to him and no amount of 10"s he might have made movies with will stop him from loving this same woman. Some things are just more important.

[Daveman]

Meaning he found a woman who means everything to him and no amount of 10"s he might have made movies with will stop him from loving this same woman. Some things are just more important.

nail head...... hammer.......   WHACK! 

Perfect hit, Viking.

[groovlstk]

It's just feeeeling that male MUST be taller than a woman (  ...on heels  - I mean WOMAN on heel  )

http://forum.antidate.org/index.php?showtopic=3402&hl=

3+ pages of discussion "height" problem at antidate forum if you wish 

My wife's a bit taller than me when she wears heels, she doesn't read antidate so she's not yet aware that this is a problem

[Elen]

Very simple example:

Two single women want to meet men of their dream.   They are of the same age and have the same levels of intellect but one woman is taking care about her look and other woman is not. Who has more chance?

To each her own. It is  a life.

Olga.

Как всегда : в огороде бузина , а в Киеве дядька.  Разговор о другом идет.

Firstly talks are ( or supposed to be) about advices to 47 y. o. who is not 10 and who is supposed to take participation in competition at a market where there is enough women of not the "same ages" and not the "same looks" ,and where "beauty and youth" go ahead all other qualities So to gamble on "appearance" would be some "idealistic"

Secondary a point was not about not taking care about appearance ( "never" and like a "matter of principle')   but about not taking participation in such competitions of appearances in order to gain a prize - a male. There are enough women who never had a need and a desire  to do that "for purpose", after all for centures there were enough males who themslves were "figting" for females as well.


 As for "a prize"  getting with one or another "method" then a result  is not predictable in both cases. That's life "Simple examples" can't describe all variations therefore for each her /his own.

[Elen]

My wife's a bit taller than me when she wears heels, she doesn't read antidate so she's not yet aware that this is a problem

A 'problem"  discussed at antidate was not created by girls from that forum and if you managed to read those pages in Russian you could find various opinions about that issue. I gave you a link in order to show you exactly various opinions. You all here is in need to be trained with getting variouse opinions   

[Jazzyclassy]

       Jazzy,

 The norm in the U.S. is men are usually married to women close to their age. I took pictures of Hollywood actors who could have the youngest and most beautiful women around because they have fame and tens of millions.many probably have gorgeous women throwing themselves at them all the time. Yet they choose charecter and probably a woman they trust rather than eye candy., many big Hollywood men are marrried to women who are not 10's and close to their age.There were tons more examples, but you get the idea. many American men are not that shallow. Some actually seek substance before anything else.

                

You calmed me down , and I really do not understand this mark which you put on women's beauty , Oh my God before walking somewhere to the shop or to throw tresh , you women make sure you look on 10 cos you never know where you can find your future husband  that is just ridiculous

this potential division 1 category of women and another one, that is just not serious , who invented this evaluation with this  10 mark

evaluate then this men please:P:P:P:P

[Jazzyclassy]

and these ones please

I bet some  men among these pic will feel so previleged to know  that they have no chance to meet a woman am not even talking about young girls , some where old women probably would struggle ........

and no matter how much money do they have they wont buy real sincere love and affection

but how can we judge them only according to their pics,  we can not unless we know them in person

so the same thing is with that woman one should not critically tell her that for example- hey you old cow you better stay at home and sweep the floor none will like you being old plus rather stout or something like that , of course you need to be realistic but not pessimistic and always encourage a person that he \she is beautiful in his \her own way

[TwoBitBandit]

evaluate then this men please:P:P:P:P

On 1-10 scale, where 10 = hot.

10, 5, 7, 4

and these ones please

6, 8, 10

And you?  How closely do you agree with me?

[Elen]

To illustrate my overall thoughts, I start with something Lilly wrote earlier,

Lilly makes an excellent point that should not be lost among the talk about stari kozels, short piles of stench and blackheads (ugh!).   The point I wish to make is that a woman's charming ways attract me more than her face or body.  Most important is the ability to have fun and enjoy each other's company.  Nevertheless Elen, I still must feel physically attracted to her and (before you say it), she with me.  
And a man should take note of Lily's list as where he can work to improve himself.

 Those points would be excelent for dating in real life and for a case people speak the same language and could spend enough time in reality And as those points were made about 47 y.o woman who was supposed to find a husband in the USA I see them not such excelent

[LEGAL]

Как всегда : в огороде бузина , а в Киеве дядька.  Разговор о другом идет.

Firstly talks was about advices to 47 y. o. who is not 10 and who is supposed to take participation in competition at a market where enough women of not the "same ages" and not the same looks

Secondary a point was not about not taking care about appearance but about not taking participation in such competitions in order to gain a prize - a male. There are enough women who never had a need and a desire  to do that "for purpose", after all for centres there were enough males who were "figting" for females as well.

 As for "a prize"  getting with one of "methods" then a result  is not predictable in both cases. That's life "Simple examples" can't describe all variation therefore for each her /his own.

No Elen, it was my intention to say it twice. I meant that the woman who is going to compete on the dating market should work on her appearance and to make herself as attractive and interesting as possible. It seems to be of paramount importance.

By appearance I mean everything that appears out of her That would include not only body, face, hair, clothing, but also her demeanor, posture, manners, voice, conversation. She may still not make it to a 10, but a thourogh work on herself would definitely upgrade any woman in the looks department.

Two single women who are 47 y.o. and  not a 10 on the dating market (dating site or real life)

Very simple example:

Two single women want to meet men of their dream.   They are of the same age and have the same levels of intellect but one woman is taking care about her look and other woman is not. Who has more chance?

Olga.

Elen,

not all men  are looking for young girls. An appearance  plays not a last role for men as well as for women. It is normal.
There is nothing bad when a woman takes care about her look to attract man's attention with her appearance and there is nothing bad for man too.

Even if you (man or woman) want to get a nice job your appearance will  play not a last role because an employer takes into account not only your professional
skills but your appearance too; and you take participation in competition in order to gain a prize - job that you want. It is a life   (Résumé with photo)

Olga.

[mspanky]

Appearance does play a role in attracting a partner of the opposite sex no matter how we may try to deny it.

 Because sex in involved in a "normal" marriage.A woman who tells me looks don't matter at all and she has no preference ,is one that would make me wonder why she is still alone if she is so accomodating . What exactly is she looking for that is so hard to find then?Plenty of unattractive nice guys out there. Unless she means appearance does not matter to her, because money is what she finds attractive in a mate.

 I spoke with a man the other day who confirmed his wife is 27 years younger than he is. They are both American and he is filthy rich. He said it meant nothing since he does not have sex anyway and now does'nt even know if he is capable if the wife miraculously wanted it. I sort of felt sorry for him as he married a woman who is beautiful and keeps herself in spectacular shape. but alas having sex with her husband is not what she wants. Sad. She apparantly is attracted to his money, but not his physical being. that sort of marriage would not work for me at all.

[Elen]

Elen,
 not all men  are looking for young girls. An appearance doesn't play a last role for men as well as for women. It is normal.
There is nothing bad when a woman takes care about her look to attract man's attention with her appearance and there is nothing bad for man too.

Even if you (man or woman) want to get a nice job your appearance will not play a last role because an employer takes into account not only your professional
skills but your appearance too; and you take participation in competition in order to gain a prize - job that you want. It is a life  (Résumé with photo)

Olga.

 Wonder how much posts it would get from you to show me where I said something that taking care about appearance was bad thing for women or for men ?  or that appearance didin't not matter

You have a half of hour to make few tries before I'll off to my Photoshop to get out the most of peoples' appearance 

 

[Lily]

Those points would be excelent for dating in real life 

Disagree. There is not much difference whether it is dating in real or online. Rules of attraction are the same.
What is different here are the tools used by person.
The online dating  is about expressing herself only through pictures and in written words, plus eventually through phone / webcam. 

However I completely agree with Elen about importance of speaking the same language, for sure. 

[Elen]

Online dating starts with profile with ages and photo. Before she get a chance to demonstrate her charm and other abilities in making good impression on males ( without 10 look) her profile would be in a trash.  ( that's a difference to dating in reality where there is more time and ways to make that impression except "just look" ) 
 So in her particular case there should be another approach than what was suggested.

[El Rock]

You 2 might as well start writing in Russian cuzz your English  makes little sense

[Elen]

You 2 might as well start writing in Russian cuzz your English  makes little sense

I just don't know what to suggest to you darling Because what you post has not sense as well and your problem could not be healed in such easy way like improving English

[El Rock]

I just don't know what to suggest to you darling Because what you post has not sense as well and your problem could not be healed in such easy way like improving English

Well , Ok then
lol

[Jazzyclassy]

On 1-10 scale, where 10 = hot.

10, 5, 7, 4

6, 8, 10

And you?  How closely do you agree with me?

well yeah I agree with you but that does not change anything really cos those who are  looking as you say on 10 might be a pile of shite as people

and I also would like to say that we are not talking about taking care of our appearance cos all women do take care or at least try to care about how they look and none here denied it was good and important

I take care of my appearance to look tidy and knit nothing special here, even though I started to have grey hairs I am not gonna dye my hair till  it will be irritating or something

   Wonder how much posts it would get from you to show me where I said something that taking care about appearance was bad thing for women or for men ?  or that appearance didn't not matter  
          

I agree women are women we want to be attractive and we try to look after our appearance

but the question was different and you all try to walk away from it, and start talking about different matters

from the start we talked that  the woman in her 45 y.o  of course had maybe not so many chances to find somebody super amazing and her age man but that does not mean she is in a miserable position and many people claimed here that she actually was in the situation of no way out but to marry like some 70 y.o. man or something like that

and then you started floating in the other direction and telling that oh if she is fat and does not take care of her looks and bla bla bla then that is her own fault and she needs to understand the rules of  marriage market and so on , that is a different topic I am sorry

There are so many young and not bad looking girls who are struggling to find anybody for marriage, there are so many young and hot looking successful girls who can not find anybody to create a family with , that is just individual cases and maybe or even not maybe but the problem is in those women themselves in their attitude not in their appearance of course and also the problem is with this society modern standards  that many women do not fit in the frames men are inventing and so on

Just really how can we put a mark on the woman we do not know , never seen her ,never talked to her , maybe she is a great super personality which can cover her looks and her age

come on where is your encouraging kind amercian attitude , GO  Girl Go Girl You can do  it or something like a?))))

[Lily]

Online dating starts with profile with ages and photo. Before she get a chance to demonstrate her charm and other abilities in making good impression on males ( without 10 look) her profile would be in a trash.  ( that's a difference to dating in reality where there is more time and ways to make that impression except "just look" ) 
 

Her profile would not be in a trash but just unnoticed. That's why my advice # 3 - to initiate contact by herself.

[Elen]

That's why my advice # 3 - to initiate contact by herself.

That's why I said her profile would be in a trash 

BTW where are males with their advices, opinions, ideas and "theoretical" ( because all here prefer more younger women as I got that or at least older one but good looking)  reasonings what to do? How they would react on such initiated contact (honestly)

 I may be missed their advices in all that ocean of posts (  а-ля "в Киеве дядька")  So far I can recall only an advice to use local sites where attitude to ages is different to what she would have at Russian dating scene and where she would have less competition of looks because there are enough fat local women there.
  ( problem here wold be only her English skills and a tradition to ban/blokade ANYone from FSU at local dating sites)

 Was it something else ?