Wife split!

[groovlstk]

Groove:

It is the same as a battered woman who goes back to an abusive man.  They tend blame themselves for a lot of the situation.  It is hard to know what it is like if we have not gone through it.  Let us just be grateful we have not.  The poor man does not like being alone, I do not know many people that do. 

Now we are not going to enable him either.

Yes, and the battered woman who kisses the feet of her abuser needs professional help a lot more than she needs sympathy and understanding, something I was trying to arrive at here in a respectful and roundabout way.

[Diplomacy]

Sorry Groov, yes I hope Wayne get help through this by someone that can help.  I do not think anyone of us are them.  It just sucks, and think we made our point.  We do not need to push him away either. 

Well there is Maxx posting.  Hope he listens to you man!

[tim 360]

Hey Wayne, Don't worry about the motion sensor lights.  Mine will come on when it gets windy or if I get snow...it doesn't take much.  Some models have a sensitivity selector but they are not perfect.  Best therapy for you is to do some good stuff for yourself and put the past behind you.

[Doll]

(after Wayne's last post) Guys, what did his wife do wrong? Awfully wrong that the board has been concerned "for" 35 pages? She didn't like something in Wayne and the way he lived and left. She didn't do any harm, you are wasting your anger.
She didn't abuse him or money. Come on!
Wayne is alone again? It is sad but he needs to blame himself- THREE women left him.
Ah, the only things she does "wrong" is she is not  leaving the country! It is up to her and none of Wayne's concern , it is HER choice where to live and how to live.
She is behaving quite decently right now, you need to admit it.

[Doll]

he has been through hell.

 
Like what? She hasn't done any harm so long. As for Wayne who has been watching his wife in another bedroom or cheating- it is up to him. It has nothing to do with her being RW or UW or AW- it happens all over any country.Women don't like their husbands and they leave, so did this woman. Some men are able to keep their wives, some are not.
So if she goes back to Russia in this situation- she is a good girl, since she is not- she is so bad.

[Jet]

(after Wayne's last post) Guys, what did his wife do wrong? Awfully wrong that the board has been concerned "for" 35 pages? She didn't like something in Wayne and the way he lived and left. She didn't do any harm, you are wasting your anger.
She didn't abuse him or money. Come on!
Wayne is alone again? It is sad but he needs to blame himself- THREE women left him.
Ah, the only things she does "wrong" is she is not  leaving the country! It is up to her and none of Wayne's concern , it is HER choice where to live and how to live.
She is behaving quite decently right now, you need to admit it.

I'm not entirely in agreement with Doll, but overall she brings up some very good points. Marriages break down regardless of the nationalities of husband & wife. We cannot know if she entered into the marriage in good faith, but if she did, it is merely a sad story, and not a conspiracy to defraud Wayne and/or the gov't. While Eastern European society is more lenient regarding extra curricular activities, the society she has chosen to live in is not, and if she was indeed "messing around on the side" before the end of the marriage, that would be the thing she did "wrong". Whether she chooses to remain here or go back is irrelevant, and should not be Wayne's or our concern. Even though he *may* be impacted by the affidavit of support, he knew those risks when he signed on the dotted line. I can think of a dozen ways this could have played out MUCH worse for Wayne.

[dobradavid]

Guys:

Wayne got the lawyer and headed in the right direction to protect himself.  This is probably one of the only places he has a support group.  Lay off the poor man, he has been through hell.  You can correct me if I am wrong Wayne on anything I post OK?

So join a gym - start a fitness program. Adopt a laid back dog from a shelter. If you are lonely, come down to Chicago and rake my leaves, clean the garage, etc.    

[dobradavid]

 
Like what? She hasn't done any harm so long. As for Wayne who has been watching his wife in another bedroom or cheating- it is up to him. It has nothing to do with her being RW or UW or AW- it happens all over any country.Women don't like their husbands and they leave, so did this woman. Some men are able to keep their wives, some are not.
So if she goes back to Russia in this situation- she is a good girl, since she is not- she is so bad.

Where she goes is really not an issue - we upper-class sophisticated types have a saying: "It ain't over 'till da fat lady sings." And this is not over.  Lots of things can happen. Ve razumiyeh, Pani?

[dobradavid]

I'm not entirely in agreement with Doll, but overall she brings up some very good points. Marriages break down regardless of the nationalities of husband & wife. We cannot know if she entered into the marriage in good faith, but if she did, it is merely a sad story, and not a conspiracy to defraud Wayne and/or the gov't. While Eastern European society is more lenient regarding extra curricular activities, the society she has chosen to live in is not, and if she was indeed "messing around on the side" before the end of the marriage, that would be the thing she did "wrong". Whether she chooses to remain here or go back is irrelevant, and should not be Wayne's or our concern. Even though he *may* be impacted by the affidavit of support, he knew those risks when he signed on the dotted line. I can think of a dozen ways this could have played out MUCH worse for Wayne.

Hmmm....Ya ne razumiyeh, Pani...you are saying in Eastern Europe it is normal and OK for the wife to stop sleeping with the husband after the wedding? Hmmmm.... 

[Lily]

Where she goes is really not an issue - we upper-class sophisticated types have a saying: "It ain't over 'till da fat lady sings." 

David, what does it mean?

The last line with Pani could probably be understood by Ukrainians and Poles only

[dobradavid]

I am not in jail.  I am not in trouble with the law.  I do not have much to report right now.  I am alone in my house for more than a week now.  It is very quiet now, as I was used to having wife, daughter, dog and student here.  In spite of all the terrible things, I still miss them.  At least I feel safe at least for the present.

Daughter is still attending the same school.  People I know say she is not taking the school bus, but is using the public transportation bus.  There is a substidized public bus system here.  If you see a bus, there might be only one person besides the driver.  The school district extends 10 miles from the school towards the city area, so I would guess that where they are staying is more than 10 miles away, but less than 20 miles.

Yesterday, when I came home from work, one of the outside lights that are controled by motion sensors was on.  The sensor is set to turn the light off after five minutes, so something must have just turned the light on.  There was no car in the driveway, and no tracks in the freshly fallen snow.  There were no footprints near the light.  Must have been a wild animal.A few days ago, there were about a dozen wild turkeys just a few feet from the front porch.  I could have hit one with a ball bat and turned her into Thanksgiving dinner! 

Will Wayne go to to jail and make a big, new friend named "Bubba"? Will he get into trouble with the law (see "jail", see "Bubba"). Will he remain alone in his house? Will it remain quiet now? Will he giver his wife one more "last chance" because he's lonely? If he does, will he continue to feel safe? Will the outside lights continue to "come on". Will Wayne hit a wild turkey over the head with a baseball bat (see "trouble with the law", see "jail", see "Bubba") for thanksgiving dinner - or will he spring for $20 and have Jewel-Osco cook it for him? Will "Doll" continue to insist that "it's all Wayne's fault"?

Tune in next week for the exciting continuing saga of "Desperate Husbands"... 

[dobradavid]

David, what does it mean?

The last line with Pani could probably be understood by Ukrainians and Poles only

How about "Gospozhiska"? 

[Maxx2]

you are saying in Eastern Europe it is normal and OK for the wife to stop sleeping with the husband after the wedding? Hmmmm.... 

Then later she gets a boyfriend but still wants Wayne to help her get a green card. Which BTW is illegal. Then she comes over to his house with the police in tow so an abuse charge by her must have been made. For Jet to say her marriage to Wayne is "not a conspiracy to defraud Wayne and/or the gov't" strikes me as naive. In my opinion she is a pure GCG and so is Doll. Both of them should be deported back to where they came from with or without their husbands' approval.


Maxx

[Doll]

Ve razumiyeh, Pani? Cool

I do  But nothing terrible has happened yet. Not more than in the case with any AW who decides to leave her husband. There is nothing yet to scream about.

[Doll]

David, what does it mean?

The last line with Pani could probably be understood by Ukrainians and Poles only

It means "Do you understand?" Pani is for "woman" 
Guess Jet is also a woman 

[Doll]

Will "Doll" continue to insist that "it's all Wayne's fault"?

It is a "yes". Know nothing about turkeys before Thanksgiving 

[Doll]

Both of them should be deported back to where they came from with or without their husbands' approval.

Both- who?

[Doll]

Ah, I see- both is for Wayne's wife and me
Maxx , I am the US citizen, too late 

[William3rd]

Then later she gets a boyfriend but still wants Wayne to help her get a green card. Which BTW is illegal. Then she comes over to his house with the police in tow so an abuse charge by her must have been made. For Jet to say her marriage to Wayne is "not a conspiracy to defraud Wayne and/or the gov't" strikes me as naive. In my opinion she is a pure GCG and so is Doll. Both of them should be deported back to where they came from with or without their husbands' approval.


Maxx

I think you are wrong about doll. A trip to the local vet might just fix her right up. If not, just put her down. . . .

[dobradavid]

I do  But nothing terrible has happened yet...There is nothing yet to scream about.

...said the man after he jumped off the Empire State Building as he passed the 94th floor. 

[Lily]

  "It ain't over 'till da fat lady sings."   

Oh dears dears Sorry if I was not quite clear in asking my question. I wanted to have the quoted words commented, not anything else

[Doll]

I think you are wrong about doll. A trip to the local vet might just fix her right up. If not, just put her down. . . .

:hipdude:

[Doll]

Both of them should be deported back to where they came from with or without their husbands' approval.

 Maxx ,they will only need your approval. Willy doesn't count :evil:

[Maxx2]

Maxx , I am the US citizen, too late 

If there was justice in this world you would be stripped of your US citizenship and your clothes and parachuted out the back of a transport buck naked over Siberia. (my fantasy of how I wanted my GCG ex to be sent back)



Maxx

[Doll]

If there was justice in this world you would be stripped of your US citizenship and your clothes and parachuted out the back of a transport buck naked over Siberia. (my fantasy of how I wanted my GCG ex to be sent back)



Maxx

Thank  you
 
Naked to Siberia! Sounds romantic!
Whats is "bUck"?