Wife split!

[Gator]

It is for a SHE 

IIRC, stary kazel would be for a man.  And it is a very unkind remark in Russian culture.

[Admin]

Faux Pax

You asked if the couple looks mismatched in the picture. I told you what my perception is: 20-25 years of age difference. You may have a different perception, and we do not have to agree on this.

As to finding fault with those who choose a big age difference - this is a completely different topic, which has been beaten to death. Opinions differ a lot onthis one. And yes, I am aware that many couples on this board have a large age difference.

What do you consider "large"?

Is 5 years difference "large"? .... 10? .... 15?

Where do you draw the line?

- Dan

[Sculpto]

What do you consider "large"?

Is 5 years difference "large"? .... 10? .... 15?

Where do you draw the line?

- Dan

why do people care so much about age difference?  I need a much younger woman.. retirement plan..  JUST KIDDING!

[SANDRO43]

  I need a much younger woman.. retirement plan..  JUST KIDDING!

I'm ALREADY retired, so I need an even YOUNGER woman  .

[Russiangirl]

Ok, armchair psycholigists, they say a photograph is worth a 1000 words.

I just saw the picture.

My very humble opinion - a HUGE age difference. In relative terms, a very young woman, a much older guy - a recipe for disaster as soon as she can upgrade.

Wayne at least gets brownie points for not chasing a teenager. But even the girl in the photograph is not anywhere near his age.

Guys, can you imagine being long term with a woman 15-20 years your senior? Well, surprise, suprise, it's no fun for us girls either. I'm just saying... 

Sorry. If you take cultural differences, then add an age difference - what exactly are you hoping for in such situation? A miracle? (Your only hope would be to find a young trumpet who's either not able to find a more appealing replacement or not smart enough to be able to stand on her own - otherwise, most young women get tired of older guys. "Daddy complex" is something to eventually outgrow.)

[Doll]

  If you take cultural differences, then add an age difference - what exactly are you hoping for in such situation?

To be loved for who they are- purified love 

[Faux Pas]

What do you consider "large"?

Is 5 years difference "large"? .... 10? .... 15?

Where do you draw the line?

- Dan

FWIW What I would consider large would apply only to me so it wouldn't really matter anyway. But to answer your question I would say 10 years is considerate and 15 is large anything above that would be huge.

[GoodOlBoy]

What do you consider "large"?

Is 5 years difference "large"? .... 10? .... 15?

Where do you draw the line?

- Dan

Dan, I know you were not speaking to me directly. But, I would like to throw in my 2 cents.

When I started my search several years ago, 5 years was my limit.

Then I met my wife and it wound up being almost 10 years difference in age. 

I guess anybody can rationalize a decision about age difference, to make themselves feel better about it.

In my mind, if the girl is over 18 years younger than the man, then she could be his DAUGHTER'S age.

This kind of age difference is just to uncomfortable for me to understand. It approaches the realm of "Jerry Springer" material.

[Faux Pas]

GoodolBoy

A very close friend of mine always kept his standard to ladies older than his children. He has since went back on that and announced it to his children because that are reaching their 40's and he says it no longer applies 

[Misha]

When I started my search several years ago, 5 years was my limit.

Then I met my wife and it wound up being almost 10 years difference in age. 

This is reasonable. I would say it works well because it fits the ideal most Russian women have. If ask Russian women what is the ideal age difference, most will say the husband being 5 years old, but they would be willing to settle for a man 10 years older if he was really great. The farther away you are from the 10 year mark, the better the odds that the woman is getting involved for reasons other than love and the hope of a "death-do-you-part" marriage.

I am 10 years older than my wife as well.

[pitbull]

FWIW What I would consider large would apply only to me so it wouldn't really matter anyway. But to answer your question I would say 10 years is considerate and 15 is large anything above that would be huge.

Dan,

My opinion is very close to what Faux Pas has written

[Pike]

  Guys, can you imagine being long term with a woman 15-20 years your senior? Well, surprise, suprise, it's no fun for us girls either. I'm just saying . . .  most young women get tired of older guys.

Russiangirl, I am not a proponent of large age differences.

However, surely you must know you are wrong to try to equate (older man - younger woman) to (older woman - younger man).

There are important psychological, sociological and reproductive reasons why the first grouping has been around since the beginning of human existence.  The second grouping has always been a very small abberation.

Also we must always distinguish between 1) absolute age differences and 2) the actual age of he woman.    i.e. True that an 18 year old gal will quickly tire of the 38 year old man (in most cases).  But not necessarily true that the 38 year old woman will quickly tire of the 58 year old man.

[Wayne]

I want to thank HiTech for the information on Texas driver's license and Misha for the help on the internal passport.

Does anyone else have more information?

I explained before that the first woman I was involved with is 6 years older than wife.  I did not search out for someone so young. 

I placed my profile on a website.  That included recent photos, my exact age and birthday, detailed information, and story.  I stated that I did not want to consider any woman who smoked.  I said that I would be willing to accept a woman who had a child or who wanted to have a child.  Within less than 24 hours after posting my profile, O answered and also gave me her private email address.  She knew exactly what she was getting into.  She was looking for an older man.  The age preference in her profile was for a much older man.  She probably got this idea from L.  I think that L's exhusband is actually about 30 years older than L. 

L set the pattern and all the other women followed suit. 

I am looking at the requirements for obtaining a Cosmetology license in the State of New York. 

" Any individual having five years of legal experience in an occupation equivalent to Cosmetology may apply for a New York State license by submitting satisfactory evidence of education and experience"

then it goes on listing sample forms of evidence, followed by

"After your application is reviewed and accepted, you may obtain a Cosmetology license in New York State without examination or further education"

This is extremely less requirements than is required in Michigan.  So wife should be able to obtain the license and start working, which I hope she does.  You know, she lost important documents such as her high school dipolma in the baggage lost by Delta.  The lost baggage was a large problem.

[Misha]

I want to thank HiTech for the information on Texas driver's license and Misha for the help on the internal passport.

You are welcome!

Within less than 24 hours after posting my profile, O answered and also gave me her private email address.  She knew exactly what she was getting into.  She was looking for an older man.  The age preference in her profile was for a much older man.  She probably got this idea from L.  I think that L's exhusband is actually about 30 years older than L. 

Well, if I were a woman looking for a man to marry so I could move to another country, I would follow O. strategy to a t. She succeeded didn't she   

[mspanky]

  A lot of women from al over the world think old men or much older men are easy target for relationships. Especially if she is competing with women younger and more beautiful. One foot in the grave and another on a banana peel seems to be the ideal guy for many women who want quick money.

  In fact the "Old rich(or perceived rich)fools" are so easy to target even men are doing it. Saw some guy on Tv talking about Ivana Trumps wedding. She married a guy 25 years younger and now marriage is over after 7 months. The guest at Ivana's  wedding commented how funny ity was that the wedding was full of Ivana's older female friends and their MUCH younger handsome boytoys. The shocking thing is,she is now dating a guy in his early 20's. I guess she and Donald love young blood and know they have the money to attract it.

  I do think money motivates many women with older men. Paul Mccartney's wife Heather was known to fool around with young men and comment on Paul's old age . She was found to be having an affair with 21 year old trainer in their divorce. As much as I hate to admit it, I do agree with Russiangirl that many younger women get tired of much older men. Probably why they never will remarry a much older guy if they leave and have oppurtunity.

  I wonder what the statistics are for RW married to much older men divorcing, and then marrying another much older man. Unless he has money and lots of it. On the average I think a RW who is divorced from AM and already in the U.S. probably marries a man much closer to her age the second time around.

[ChrisBfla]

Wow, all I can say, and you might not beleive me is that it could be worse.  My wife and I have a friend from Scotland who was married to a woman my wife knows, from her same city.  She tried to frame her husband for attempted murder.  He was in jail awaiting trial before he got bailed out.  My wife, (who has a degree in psychology from the US now) testified against this woman and she she was a borderline psychopath.  Our friend won the case and she was kicked out of Scotland.

[Russiangirl]

surely you must know you are wrong to try to equate (older man - younger woman) to (older woman - younger man).

I know nothing of the sort. Women, men - we're NOT that much different in our desires. Just as most people would prefer eating chocolate to eating poop, they would prefer a nubile 25 year old body to take to bed instead of a wrinkly 65 year old one.

All else being equal (that's an important qualifier), a young hot stud will be more sexually desirable than an old fart to any woman. That's just the way the cookie crumbles...   

There are important psychological, sociological and reproductive reasons why the first grouping has been around since the beginning of human existence.  The second grouping has always been a very small abberation.

Psychological reasons = also known as "daddy" issues. Not a good foundation for a healthy relationship, IMHO.

Sociological reasons... Not so long ago, it was customary for 13 year old girls to marry and give birth. That does NOT mean that particular social grouping was desirable to girls involved. Yes, there were many reasons young girls were often paired with old men. Does not mean those same young girls would not prefer a young men their age, all else being equal.

Reproductive reasons = goes both ways. Younger guys have better sperm (sorry for being gross, but age is a factor in reproductive health). If a woman wants a healthy child, she has much better chances with a young guy than an old one.

As for an "abberation" of an older woman/younger guy - hey, isn't it funny how usually it's wealthy powerful women who have young "boytoys"? This goes back to your point about sociological reasons - goes both ways.

Look, my point is, women are not from another planet, we girls have our sexual desires too, just like you guys - and no, sleeping with a guy old enough to be our father is NOT usually the high point of any girl's fantasies.  (Apart from 17-18 year olds who sometimes fall in love with 50 year olds - "cough* daddy issues *cough* - but they usually quickly outgrow it.)

[Diplomacy]

I know nothing of the sort. Women, men - we're NOT that much different in our desires. Just as most people would prefer eating chocolate to eating poop,

Too bad the opposite was not true, someone could make a mint with the poop thrown around here sometimes.

[Wayne]

I found this information on the USCIS website:

Penalties for Failure to Comply
A willful failure to give written notice to the USCIS of a change of address within 10 days of the change is a misdemeanor crime. If convicted, the alien (or parent or legal guardian of an alien under age 14 who is required to give notice) can be fined up to $200 or imprisoned up to 30 days, or both. The alien may also be subject to removal from the United States. (INA § 266(b)). Compliance with the requirement to notify the USCIS of any address changes is also a condition of an alien’s stay in the United States. Failure to comply could also jeopardize the alien’s ability to obtain a future visa or other immigration benefit

Since wife and daughter have been gone for much longer than 10 days, they should have filed a AR-11 Alien"s Change of Address Card.  If they have, it may serve as a means to locate them.  If not, then they have broken a law. 

[BC]

If not, then they have broken a law. 

There is a heck of a lot of 'may', 'could' and 'can' in that website statement.. not one 'will'.

Your sentence above lacks just one word and that is 'may'.

"Just went to a friends house for a while to blow off some steam" is probably enough to turn things around.

Is there a curfew for RW in the US?

[HiTech]

Wayne: I assume you wish to locate her just to file papers correct?

[Wayne]

Yes and to locate the car.

[HiTech]

1. I assume she has an email address, can you send her a not that you have some papers concerning immigration you need to send her, and hence get her address?

2. File a missing persons report?

[Wayne]

 
Divorce after the issuance of a conditional green card
Aliens who obtain their permanent residence based on their relationship with a U.S. citizen spouse or step-parent are granted conditional permanent residence if the qualifying marriage took place within two years prior to the date permanent residence was conferred. Conditional permanent residence means that the permanent residence is subject to termination if it is found that the qualifying marriage was a sham marriage or a marriage that was entered into only for purposes of obtaining an immigration benefit. Other than the conditional permanent resident being subject to having his status terminated for this reason, he is afforded the same rights as is any other permanent resident. Within ninety days prior to the two-year anniversary of the permanent residence being granted to the alien, the alien and spouse must apply to have the condition removed.

When permanent residence is granted conditionally to an alien spouse, that conditional permanent residence may be terminated within two years from the date permanent residence was granted if the marriage has been terminated through divorce. This rule also applies to the child of the alien spouse who obtains his conditional permanent residence based on the marital relationship of his parent. In other words, the general rule is that divorce terminates conditional permanent residence. Nevertheless, in this scenario, it is possible for the alien to obtain a waiver of the termination. A waiver of the termination is granted to the alien if the alien can show that the marriage was a union in good faith and the alien was not at fault for his failure to file the joint petition to remove the condition. Generally speaking, when the conditional permanent resident can show that the marriage was entered into in good faith, it is presumed that he was not at fault for failing to file a joint petition. Two ways to show that a marriage was entered into in good faith are proving that the couple had a child together and producing evidence that the couple owned property jointly.
 
 

[Sculpto]

Wayne.. correct me if I am wrong but it sounds like you would like to have her deported...