Saved by Mila

[Daveman]

At least all the sheep and cows here in Kalifornia aren't nervous like they are in OkkieVille.

They're beyond nervous.. here they're beginning to form coalitions and lobby groups - to the chagrin of many of us whose sexual exploits will be unjustly curtailed!

[Faux Pas]

What in the hell is Californicate? 

Are you trying to tell us that we fornicate out here? 

Well, if you are, I resemble that remark.

At least all the sheep and cows here in Kalifornia aren't nervous like they are in OkkieVille.

Well if they aren't, they should be. 

Californicate is that land mass on the liberal left coast which was the aspirations that Sodom and Gomorrah could never achieve. That collective group of folks that can't find anyone for senators other than the most brain dead women in the state. Yup, that's the one

 

[steveboy]

Steve,  no one here seems so dumb to mention money considering the abuse scammers deal.

also,  there is always someone richer,  smarter,  better  looking,  etc. that still doesn't take away the fact that in a room full of guys the combination of smarts,  looks,  wealth,  upbringing,  etc.  should make you the catch. there's only one Stephen hawking, one  bill gates,  and billions of women...

 take for instance,  my single male friends:  junior faculty at ivy league schools,  make 100k+,  athletic and good people.  they are interesting,  hobbies,  travel,  cultured,  etc.  but no wife/ girlfriend.

now my single female friends, a few are single mothers, the father we don't even know,  another set are actively dating the bad boys from town,  and all  working  predictable,  boring  jobs in government or  teaching.  yet they don't date guys like my single friends because they are boring.

I swear they are boring! I don't even talk to my single female friends anymore. I think they are losers that squandered a world class education. when the  elite female crop emulate the bottom of the barrel,  then I know the pickings are slim.

Lots of intelligent high class women like a bad boy especially if they give them good sex! Good sex is a vital point

[steveboy]

Lots of intelligent high class women like a bad boy especially if they give them good sex! Good sex is a vital point

Just like many women fantasise about having sex with a black guy!!They have some thing apparently many men don't have, well so they say!!

[Hammer2722]

Just like many women fantasise about having sex with a black guy!!They have some thing apparently many men don't have, well so they say!!

A different skin color? 

[Daveman]

If one were to talk to a woman (or a man) and was judging a future partner, it would not be based on the 'Game' that one has - although that can play in to future dates - but the attitude one has towards life. 

If one were to talk to a woman about it one would rarely get a correct answer.  Triggers don't work that way.


You are correct though..


Game is an ambiguous term..  some naturally have "game", some practice at it, and some pretend to have it.


The latter two can be considered to project a certain aura or attitude, the former lives it.  What it boils down to more than anything else is confidence.  A woman feels certain feelings in the presence of a very confident man (combined with but more so than appearance).  She's attracted to what she considers the source of those feelings.

[Daveman]

Lots of intelligent high class women like a bad boy especially if they give them good sex! Good sex is a vital point

Bad boys generally exude confidence - sex merely comes with it.

[YoungBuck]

YB, it's not nearly as complicated as it seems.  Those guys, and perhaps some here, don't understand a simple fact - attraction is a triggered response.  That has nothing to do with how much you make or your education level.  It's a behavioral science.  What women say they want and that to which they are actually attracted are a little different.  It's great when both of those reside in the same package.

I work in the electronics industry and when I want a quality connector, I turn to gold. Gold doesn't have to trigger a response or qualify itself over silver or copper or glass.
I look at the qualities it has: good conductor, inert, malleable/ductile, etc.
Silver and copper both rust/corrode, etc. While glass is not even a conductor but insulates.

If I were looking for a stable family and loving husband, I would search for someone like my friends. Yet I find women reaching out for glass type of guys...

So then that only means they aren't really searching for a stable family and loving husband after all!

All those characteristics I list, they represent qualities that speak volumes about that person. Junior faculty= smart, determined, leadership, devoted.
100+k=stable income, good life, nice clothes, car, etc.
Athletic=...

How more passionate can you get when you work on a field that only 100 people in the world could understand, and only 10 people could contribute, yet it's groundbreaking or revolutionary enough to change people's lives?

[GQBlues]

...I think you paint everyone here when the " ugly, loser mob brush stroke".  most men here are the cream of the crop. <snip> This is a unique corner of the internet,  so I hang around. but it isn't the loser corner of the internet.

YB-

Ironically, the post you quoted already summed up my thoughts to your post had you taken the time to remain objective while reading it.

We all have choices in life. Obviously, despite the claims of your accomplishments at *30ish* you're still left with an empty feeling and void. That's got to sux. Denial or acceptance, man. We all have that choice.

Like Boethius said, confidence is the root for success. Yet, confidence can be many things on so many levels. So for this particular topic, let me explore one type of confidence that deals largely with this matter.

Allow me to share a little story with you about one of my homeboys (I don't mean to make this sound chauvinistic to any of the ladies in the house, just sharing some boy-talk for a moment). My boy was born and raised in Brooklyn. Born with a silver spoon in his mouth and with a studly name, too - Bruce. He's money on our 3-some when we'd cruise citywide blacktops and hardwoods looking for 3-on-3 B-Ball jamfest. We were a pretty nasty team.

Anyway, this guy can walk into any social scene, bars, beach, clubs, malls, parties, etc...and women would go out of their way to get his attention. Like in B-Ball, when he's in a zone, he's bank. He's got talented Barbies thanking gawd and every angel they're women. Like ripened fruits on a low hanging branch, all he had to do is walk on by and pick any one of them. Sometimes, we all feel like the 'rocks' around him, we're 'there' but no one really notices, LOL.

Well, that's ~ MOST OF THE TIME ~ note: not all of the time.

*Not All Of The Time* There are times he'd show up with some less-than-stellar women draped all over him, or we'd lay witness in him scamming (that's the term we used to use when one of the boys are on a pick-up prowl) some serious loose change (less-than-attractive females) - LOL. Yeah, some were the ones like, 'Whoa! WTF! That's not even a nickel! That's a serious penny, man'

So needless to say, the boys and I started having those *WTF* moments with each other until one day in a gym I asked him 'why'. This what he said, while a grin...

"It's a drill, GQ. You know that. Just like B-Ball, bro. A game we all play. Sometimes you have 'game' sometimes you just don't. There are times when the bank is closed and you're out there laying bricks, you realize you are loosing the feel, and then BANG! You're out of the zone (confidence). So what do you do, right?".

He holds the ball with one hand while the other sways to the side with palms up while looking at me as though words are not necessary. He dribbles the ball once and takes a jumper from the elbow - swisssh!. Turns to me and continues...

"Some guys will probably just push the issue and get skunked. Others likely just sits and call 'game out'. Me, I start to accept reality and start doing the little things. I know what I can do, where I belong and need to be. I just need to find my way back there. So, I start to hit the boards, I dish, I 'D-up' tight, I play the game right...pretty soon, I start to get back into the 'flow' and the game starts to come and finds me...you know that, man. C'mon now! It's really the same with women"


So, I'll digress and just leave you a nugget to think about.

YB, I'll give you the best unsolicited advice you'll ever get.
 
Forget the former Soyuz for the time being. Try to develop your social manners here first. You say you have the financial means to socialize. DO IT!!! (As an example) Join a Tae Kwon Do school, they'll teach you assertiveness. Maybe you'll make some friends there because they are in the same boat.
 
The former Soyuz is NOT the solution to your social problems. Well, not problems. Let's call it shortcomings. Shyness or lack of confidence is not a sin nor something to be ashamed off. It is very changable. It just take a little effort and believe in yourself. (I'm serious about the Karate stuff.)
 
Finding a RW in the former Soyuz is not going to change the way you are.
 
Good Luck

Sports/Team Sports is the best thing for anyone who really want to gel and learn how to interact, negotiate, conduct, mesh, be comfortable and understand how to be 'naturally' social. That extends to your association with women as well. You become less of a stick, rigid and a loner. Didn't you notice this back in high school? Jocks got all the bad rap in Hollywood but they get all the women in real life.

BTW, at ~30ish, a 6:30 mile is slow......

Funny you mentioned that. I was going to say the same thing but did expected TomT to chime in. 630 miler isn't 'running', that's 'jogging'.

[Gator]

At least all the sheep and cows here in Kalifornia aren't nervous like they are in OkkieVille.

Obviously, you have never had a good goat.   

[Daveman]

I work in the electronics industry and when I want a quality connector, I turn to gold. Gold doesn't have to trigger a response or qualify itself over silver or copper or glass.
I look at the qualities it has: good conductor, inert, malleable/ductile, etc.
Silver and copper both rust/corrode, etc. While glass is not even a conductor but insulates.

If I were looking for a stable family and loving husband, I would search for someone like my friends. Yet I find women reaching out for glass type of guys...

So then that only means they aren't really searching for a stable family and loving husband after all!

All those characteristics I list, they represent qualities that speak volumes about that person. Junior faculty= smart, determined, leadership, devoted.
100+k=stable income, good life, nice clothes, car, etc.
Athletic=...

How more passionate can you get when you work on a field that only 100 people in the world could understand, and only 10 people could contribute, yet it's groundbreaking or revolutionary enough to change people's lives?

You're projecting logic on emotion.  I'm fairly certain a rich, educated, with wonderful personality 600lb toothless woman isn't going to fire off anything in you. 

[LAman]

What in the hell is Californicate? 
 
At least all the sheep and cows here in Kalifornia aren't nervous like they are in OkkieVille.

As the saying goes.....In Okkieville, it is where the men are men and sheep is scared!!!! 

[jone]

Let's get on with this. 

The reality is that the woman you are most likely looking for is not going to be pursuing a 'Bad Boy'.  She is going to want someone to be a provider and stable and loving partner.  The women I considered good enough to date in my history have never been the ones looking for a black man to screw or have never been trying to get laid by a guy who is going to wind up in jail next week.  If such a woman is someone you are looking for, I say, Udachi!  Keep us out of it.

There are plenty of beautiful women in the FSU who simply want a man to be the provider and the husband.  You fit both profiles, YB.  When dating here in the States or in an FSU country, it is ALL about attitude.  My suggestion for you, with your characteristics you've described, is that you get a guy who can introduce you and be your wingman.

You are a perfect candidate for Eduard's services.  What you seem to lack, he has in spades.  Go on his website and give him a call.  Then report back your success.

[jone]

Obviously, you have never had a good goat.   

Naaaaaah.  But my dad might have.

[ML]

Lots of intelligent high class women like a bad boy especially if they give them good sex! Good sex is a vital point

And you harass me about this????

[steveboy]

More and more women are looking for fun and sex only for a long time and don't want to settle down so fast, probably the reason so many men decide to search for a FSU women because as so many think they want a "Traditional family" Of coarse thats all b**** for the younger generation of women they enjoy good fun and sex and lots of it, if you cant give it to them there are plenty of guys who can!
The world is changing fast just like women all over the world, probably one big reason the divorce rate is going through the roof

[YoungBuck]

YB-

Ironically, the post you quoted already summed up my thoughts to your post had you taken the time to remain objective while reading it.

We all have choices in life. Obviously, despite the claims of your accomplishments at *30ish* you're still left with an empty feeling and void. That's got to sux. Denial or acceptance, man. We all have that choice.

Like Boethius said, confidence is the root for success. Yet, confidence can be many things on so many levels. So for this particular topic, let me explore one type of confidence that deals largely with this matter.

Allow me to share a little story with you about one of my homeboys (I don't mean to make this sound chauvinistic to any of the ladies in the house, just sharing some boy-talk for a moment). My boy was born and raised in Brooklyn. Born with a silver spoon in his mouth and with a studly name, too - Bruce. He's money on our 3-some when we'd cruise citywide blacktops and hardwoods looking for 3-on-3 B-Ball jamfest. We were a pretty nasty team.

Anyway, this guy can walk into any social scene, bars, beach, clubs, malls, parties, etc...and women would go out of their way to get his attention. Like in B-Ball, when he's in a zone, he's bank. He's got talented Barbies thanking gawd and every angel they're women. Like ripened fruits on a low hanging branch, all he had to do is walk on by and pick any one of them. Sometimes, we all feel like the 'rocks' around him, we're 'there' but no one really notices, LOL.

Well, that's ~ MOST OF THE TIME ~ note: not all of the time.

*Not All Of The Time* There are times he'd show up with some less-than-stellar women draped all over him, or we'd lay witness in him scamming (that's the term we used to use when one of the boys are on a pick-up prowl) some serious loose change (less-than-attractive females) - LOL. Yeah, some were the ones like, 'Whoa! WTF! That's not even a nickel! That's a serious penny, man'

So needless to say, the boys and I started having those *WTF* moments with each other until one day in a gym I asked him 'why'. This what he said, while a grin...

"It's a drill, GQ. You know that. Just like B-Ball, bro. A game we all play. Sometimes you have 'game' sometimes you just don't. There are times when the bank is closed and you're out there laying bricks, you realize you are loosing the feel, and then BANG! You're out of the zone (confidence). So what do you do, right?".

He holds the ball with one hand while the other sways to the side with palms up while looking at me as though words are not necessary. He dribbles the ball once and takes a jumper from the elbow - swisssh!. Turns to me and continues...

"Some guys will probably just push the issue and get skunked. Others likely just sits and call 'game out'. Me, I start to accept reality and start doing the little things. I know what I can do, where I belong and need to be. I just need to find my way back there. So, I start to hit the boards, I dish, I 'D-up' tight, I play the game right...pretty soon, I start to get back into the 'flow' and the game starts to come and finds me...you know that, man. C'mon now! It's really the same with women"


So, I'll digress and just leave you a nugget to think about.




Sports/Team Sports is the best thing for anyone who really want to gel and learn how to interact, negotiate, conduct, mesh, be comfortable and understand how to be 'naturally' social. That extends to your association with women as well. You become less of a stick, rigid and a loner. Didn't you notice this back in high school? Jocks got all the bad rap in Hollywood but they get all the women in real life.


Funny you mentioned that. I was going to say the same thing but did expected TomT to chime in. 630 miler isn't 'running', that's 'jogging'.

I used to run, age is creeping now, but 630 in your 30s is fast. Keep that pace up for a few km. Not many people can. I went to L.A. city for track and cross country but I didn't keep it up after high school. Engineering was just too hard to run in college.

I understand what you mean, but I also see Asian men, who have all these qualities and have their pick of the Asian hotties. Why is it that Asian cultures still respect and appreciate these type of guys?

I swear, it's like we are purposefully working towards the idiocracy, where the dumb jock and the slutty cheerleader populate the United states. That's how the United states slid into 20 some place in education, scores.

In Mexico, an engineer and scientist is respected. In Russia, as well. Here, the pimply faced, weird nerd stereotype dominates.

[jone]

There is a great difference between the High School Jock and the Pimply Nerd.  Who is it you feel threatened by?  Both of theses stereotypes?

You are demonstrating all of the symptoms of someone on the 'outside' of society.  Surely someone as smart as you can turn that around.

If you make as much money as you say you do, using Eduard should not even put a dent in a month's income.  I am usually not a proponent of his, but in your situation, he has what you lack.

[Muzh]

BTW, at ~30ish, a 6:30 mile is slow......

I was going to say. I used to do it in 2 or so minutes less.
 
Edit: In a 5k.

[steveboy]

Contact this women, she is the leading matchmaker in Beverly Hills Tell I recommended her to you! Im sure she can solve your problem.



http://www.linkedin.com/profile/view?id=169821423&authType=name&authToken=zS2F&trk=prof-connections-name

[jone]

More and more women are looking for fun and sex only for a long time and don't want to settle down so fast, probably the reason so many men decide to search for a FSU women because as so many think they want a "Traditional family" Of coarse thats all b**** for the younger generation of women they enjoy good fun and sex and lots of it, if you cant give it to them there are plenty of guys who can!
The world is changing fast just like women all over the world, probably one big reason the divorce rate is going through the roof

And now you know why you will have few recommendations from people on this site.  You deal in the group of people who believe in fast pickup relationships.  Your (You're for the literate) telling everyone that in going to the FSU they shouldn't anticipate a traditional family relationship.  And this is your chosen profession?  I think you have seriously misjudged your target audience. 

But, I have been wrong before and I can easily be corrected.  What does the rest of the forum think about the idea of going over to find a woman who has no desire for long term relationships, just good sex?

Been there.  Done that.  It gets old.

[Daveman]

You're projecting logic on emotion.  I'm fairly certain a rich, educated, with wonderful personality 600lb toothless woman isn't going to fire off anything in you.

600lb AND toothless?  Your pinnacle of quizzical witticism delivery is lost on these Humor Lepers... 

[LAman]

And now you know why you will have few recommendations from people on this site.  You deal in the group of people who believe in fast pickup relationships.  Your (You're for the literate) telling everyone that in going to the FSU they shouldn't anticipate a traditional family relationship.  And this is your chosen profession?  I think you have seriously misjudged your target audience. 

But, I have been wrong before and I can easily be corrected.  What does the rest of the forum think about the idea of going over to find a woman who has no desire for long term relationships, just good sex?

Been there.  Done that.  It gets old.

Jone, when was the last time you were in The Strand??? Or maybe in Florida on spring break?? or Clubs anywhere in the world? Tell me that *sex* is not on minds of men 25/8 !!! 

[LAman]

You're projecting logic on emotion.  I'm fairly certain a rich, educated, with wonderful personality 600lb toothless woman isn't going to fire off anything in you.

600lb AND toothless?  Your pinnacle of quizzical witticism delivery is lost on these Humor Lepers... 

Are you quoting yourself or talking to yourself???
I guess being a mod is getting to ya!!!

[YoungBuck]

There is a great difference between the High School Jock and the Pimply Nerd.  Who is it you feel threatened by?  Both of theses stereotypes?

You are demonstrating all of the symptoms of someone on the 'outside' of society.  Surely someone as smart as you can turn that around.

If you make as much money as you say you do, using Eduard should not even put a dent in a month's income.  I am usually not a proponent of his, but in your situation, he has what you lack.

I'm not trying to turn this into a dick measuring contest, but I wanted to counter gq's comment. I know of successful men in every sense of the word, that are single and not popular with the ladies. The converse unfortunately is more than true, but ubiquitous.

Frankly I was too busy with school, I had a long term gf, and I didn't consider what the dating landscape was until recently. I finally have looked up, so to speak, and I see a lot of change in the last > 10 years since. I'm not even old and I could see the generational changes to dating. Of course, I was always outside of the greater society, I just don't get how people enjoy reality tv shows, obsess over Kim Kardashian, etc.

I'll have to learn how to navigate these waters on my own. What use is there to attract a girl if I don't have the game to keep her?