Women with Children - more strongly worded advice

[Muzh]

Muzh, you are able to read die_cast's mind; do I need estrogen shots to attain your level of understanding?

No need to change your Axiron prescript. 
 
It can be simple to try to understand what a woman says. Just listen to them.

[Slumba]

It can be simple to try to understand what a woman says. Just listen to them.

 

 



What color is the sky on your planet? 

[Muzh]

 

 

What color is the sky on your planet? 

That may explain your success with the ladies. Duh!!!

[GQBlues]

This keeps coming back to me, although there may be a chance it was a simple typo...

Southpaw, if you can read this, mind elaborating on this a bit?

.....My relationships were rocky, I had no stability, no support, no alimony...My relatives abandoned me-they got their money jmana sent to them, then vanished a long time ago. ( We will never speak again and they live across the street)...

Was jmana still supporting your folks in Russia even after you two were divorced?

[lonedrake]

Was jmana still supporting your folks in Russia even after you two were divorced?

 Here is how I understand it. Her aunt/grandmother wrote to jmana pretending to be southpaw. Then jmana paid the aunt/grandmother for southpaw( not sure exactly what the conditions were). As soon as the aunt/grandmother received jmana's money....they had nothing more to do with southpaw or jmana.

Hopefully southpaw comes back and can elaborate on this. It may be or even would be considered human trafficking?

[GQBlues]

The manner it was written, I can't help but read it in the same fashion you explained it. Which is why I'm hoping it was a simple typo.

If you're right, and knowing how cheap jmana is, he probably even negotiated that price down.

Add: What about Alina and jmana's relationship with the 'Dad'. Is 'Dad', daddy-long-legs type of 'Dad'?

[jone]

 Here is how I understand it. Her aunt/grandmother wrote to jmana pretending to be southpaw. Then jmana paid the aunt/grandmother for southpaw( not sure exactly what the conditions were). As soon as the aunt/grandmother received jmana's money....they had nothing more to do with southpaw or jmana.

Hopefully southpaw comes back and can elaborate on this. It may be or even would be considered human trafficking?

That was really left handed!

[Gator]

Here is how I understand it. Her aunt/grandmother wrote to jmana pretending to be southpaw. Then jmana paid the aunt/grandmother for southpaw( not sure exactly what the conditions were). As soon as the aunt/grandmother received jmana's money....they had nothing more to do with southpaw or jmana.

Your summary is accurate based on several posts that touched upon the "arrangement."  Jmana confirmed it so there is no need for elaboration.  Southpaw was simply too young, only 18 yo, and they spent too little time together before marrying.   

Our marriage was arranged by my grandmother and aunt that took him in for cash, that is not what I wanted, it was completely forced and manipulated, I was 18 y.o. and did not know any better at the time).

No, I am not an angel, I was 18 and he was 24 when we met, my family was into my business  way too much and it all ended badly...

No, he is not a threat to the children lol
And as a husband, like i said...the relationship was not right, because i was inexperienced "nightmare", we rushed due to my family forcing; we did not get to know each other, he was not capable of making it work at that age, I got pregnant on the same night I lost my virginity...

My relatives abandoned me-they got their money jmana sent to them, then vanished a long time ago. ( We will never speak again and they live across the street)

My grandma and auntie were more interested in you than I was to begin with...Just so you know.

I felt close to her, but it was all lies.  Her aunt was the one writing to me.  You'd think she could have told me that when I went to visit her....  I don't have any ill feelings towards her, or her lying aunt or grandmother. Yeah they milked some money out of me, but it would have been spent on something else I'm sure, so I'm not bitter.   

[GQBlues]

So if this is in fact true, this character did engaged in an international human trafficking and had therefore broken Federal, State, International law, or at the very least, DHS's Immigration fraud.

A very interesting development considering this guy works for the government in North Carolina.

[Slumba]

So if this is in fact true, this character did engaged in an international human trafficking and had therefore broken Federal, State, International law, not least of which DHS's Immigration fraud.

No.

[Hammer2722]

Wow, the imaginations are definitely going into over-drive in this thread!!!!

[ML]

Wow, the imaginations are definitely going into over-drive in this thread!!!!

That happens in most of the relationship threads started here.

The follow-up posters know much more about what really happened than those OPs who start their thread.

Many posters could probably do quite well writing tragic romance novels.

[CanadaMan]

Add: What about Alina and jmana's relationship with the 'Dad'. Is 'Dad', daddy-long-legs type of 'Dad'?

My Gawd, why don't you read the entire post and find out for yourself!
Sheesh....

[southernX]

That happens in most of the relationship threads started here.

The follow-up posters know much more about what really happened than those OPs who start their thread.

Many posters could probably do quite well writing tragic romance novels.

 

yep agree , pretty easy to throw some more wood on the fire and stoke it along for some posters,
 SX

[jmana]

This keeps coming back to me, although there may be a chance it was a simple typo...

Southpaw, if you can read this, mind elaborating on this a bit?


Was jmana still supporting your folks in Russia even after you two were divorced?

No.  I only sent money before she came here.  I knew it wasn't all going to her, the stories didn't make sense, but it wasn't like it was a lot of money they were asking for so I sent it.  After we were married she sent a lot of money to her parents.  I felt really bad for her because she worked her butt off, and there was always another excuse why they needed just a little more.  I'm sure after we were divorced they still tried milking her, but I doubt she had much to offer.  Recently her grandmother and aunt tried to con her into sponsoring her parents to stay here, but she wouldn't have anything to do with it because she didn't want to be responsible for them.  The grandmother told her father all these stories about how he could make all this money as a truck driver here, but he doesn't even speak any English!  It was really a sad situation, and I felt so bad that she was put in the middle.  They eventually went home, but sadly her mother died about a month later at the age of 50.  I know she still harbors a lot of anger towards her aunt and grandmother, and probably deservedly so. 

[Daveman]

Which brings us back to:

... The moral of yours and other tales is guys should date a lady for at least 2 years before making any commitment. Whilst some might disagree I will add in support of my position that it’s worked well for me, I’ve yet to be divorced from a FSU woman.

[GQBlues]

blah

blah

blah

OY! Knowing your combined ages likely total close to the period of time the United States of America had been in existence, which will thereby explain your short-fused collective knee-jerk reactions, let me help you revisit the posts and bold significant contents within each one for better perspective. If you need to, wipe your reading glasses for better clarity so you can at least grasp what you're reading a little better this time around...

Post 1 - An inquiry: "This keeps coming back to me, although there may be a chance it was a simple typo...Southpaw, if you can read this, mind elaborating on this a bit? Was jmana still supporting your folks in Russia even after you two were divorced?"

Post 2 - a Response: "Here is how I understand it. Her aunt/grandmother wrote to jmana pretending to be southpaw. Then jmana paid the aunt/grandmother for southpaw( not sure exactly what the conditions were). As soon as the aunt/grandmother received jmana's money....they had nothing more to do with southpaw or jmana.

Hopefully southpaw comes back and can elaborate on this. It may be or even would be considered human trafficking?"

Post 3 - a Contributing Response: "The manner it was written, I can't help but read it in the same fashion you explained it. Which is why I'm hoping it was a simple typo. If you're right, and knowing how cheap jmana is, he probably even negotiated that price down.

Add: What about Alina and jmana's relationship with the 'Dad'. Is 'Dad', daddy-long-legs type of 'Dad'?"

Post 4 - a Response to Post 2: "Your summary is accurate based on several posts that touched upon the "arrangement." Jmana confirmed it so there is no need for elaboration.  Southpaw was simply too young, only 18 yo, and they spent too little time together before marrying."

Presented was a compiled excerpts from multiple posts that supports the assertion that Post 2's explanation is accurate and thus, valid.

Taken out was Post 2's conclusionary statement in the form of a question/suggestion....re: human trafficking.   

Post 5 - Closing string: "So if this is in fact true, this character did engaged in an international human trafficking and had therefore broken Federal, State, International law, or at the very least, DHS's Immigration fraud. A very interesting development considering this guy works for the government in North Carolina."

Hope that helps... 

------------------------------

Now for the fun part....

That happens in most of the relationship threads started here. The follow-up posters know much more about what really happened than those OPs who start their thread. Many posters could probably do quite well writing tragic romance novels.

Some, likely more than others....  It'll go something like this...

Final Act - titled: Of Love and Duty. 16:00 minutes, setting - dusk, man staring into the setting sun, looking westward. Pictures of two little children playing at a distant while man in deep consolation, searching for an answer, and slowly narrates the followng:

Voiced over..

....My Beloved is now gone from me. For many complicated reasons, it is quite likely we shall never see each other again. She has been in serious turmoil for several months over the situation in her country, and it has gotten worse in the past several weeks, of course. She has close relatives who have been called up from reserves to active military, and she fears for their lives.

She, like most other women, took required nursing courses during her University education.  And she now feels that she should take refresher courses and volunteer for this type of duty.  She wants to stand arm to arm with other women who will try to prevent bloodshed when invaders attack their countrymen.

My gal was within two months of finishing her coursework for a masters degree.  Because she was a top student, the University and her professors have agreed to let her complete exams via Internet connections (take exams during Skype sessions, etc.).  But, there is some doubt that she will actually be able to keep up with the needed study, etc.

---background music here. Preferably Air Supply's "I'm All out of Love"----

I have been totally sick and heartbroken since she left early this morning; and haven't been able to eat anything yet. She has called from two airports and has uncontrolled sobbing from being apart from me; and wonders what is actually the correct action to take.

----distant sounds of children giggling-laughing----narration continues.

....She had planned for a trip last Christmas, and had (since that time) already been planning for this trip as a replacement for the missed Christmas trip.  But the recent events caused this trip and the outlook for our future to take a terrible turn. My hatred for the 'marauding souls' grow stronger with each minute....

Scene, fade shots, and slowly pans upon the even deeper setting sun....and CUT! Roll credits, 2 lead character names first, then Title, all other credits to follow.

Background Music: The Carpenters "For All We Know"

[jmana]

So if this is in fact true, this character did engaged in an international human trafficking and had therefore broken Federal, State, International law, or at the very least, DHS's Immigration fraud.

A very interesting development considering this guy works for the government in North Carolina.

Human trafficking?  That's a stretch.  According to her, her grandmother just wanted to get rid of her because the grandmother thought she was dragging down her father (the grandmother's son).  Like I said in the last post, they really didn't ask for much money from me, if I remember right it was less than $1,000 spread out over about 7 months.  And it might have been much less than that because they did pay for a lot of stuff that I didn't even know about.  The thing is her aunt wrote most of the emails to me, and she said that was because her aunt thought that she would screw it up if she were to write because of her limited English skills, so I can kind of see the reasoning even though it was flawed.  And I spent 10 days there and not once did she show any sign that she didn't want to be with me, in fact it was the complete opposite.  And it was that way for the first 3 or 4 years of marriage.  There were times I had to push her away because it was just too intense, I wasn't used to it.  So it's not like I had any clue that she wasn't into me, if in fact that is the truth (I really don't know what to think about that one).  But human trafficking?  No, not even close. 

[jmana]

Oh, and to answer the question about if the aunt and grandmother had anything to do with either of us after the marriage, well yeah they did.  We visited them in Florida at least once (maybe twice, I can't remember).  And they used to send our son Christmas gifts.  It's not like they were outright evil people, the evilness was more behind the scenes.  They'd be nice to your face, but then talk crap about you once you were gone.  They always thought they were better than anyone else, which is funny because apparently now they are not in the best situation.  I guess that's karma biting them in the butt

[southernX]

jmana

both you and southpaw, seem to be able to respect each other ,

there will be some who want to use their ''better ''knowledge of both your lives to set you on fire, more diesel was just spilt again above you ,

ignore it ,

most of us do 

SX

[Daveman]

.. And I spent 10 days there and not once did she show any sign that she didn't want to be with me, in fact it was the complete opposite.  And it was that way for the first 3 or 4 years of marriage.  There were times I had to push her away because it was just too intense, I wasn't used to it.  So it's not like I had any clue that she wasn't into me, if in fact that is the truth (I really don't know what to think about that one).  But human trafficking?  No, not even close.

How do you reconcile the above with "..it was all lies..."

Rather difficult for someone to pull of a feat of sheer acting genius for such an extended period, don't you think?

Seems more like it was a genuine relationship that went south. It happens. The key for you would be to take responsibility for and learn from mistakes you made which assisted that relationship on its southerly course so you don't make the ultimate blunder of repetition with this one. Shoot for new and improved mistakes. 

[GQBlues]

Human trafficking?  That's a stretch.  According to her, her grandmother just wanted to get rid of her because the grandmother thought she was dragging down her father (the grandmother's son).  Like I said in the last post, they really didn't ask for much money from me, if I remember right it was less than $1,000 spread out over about 7 months.  And it might have been much less than that because they did pay for a lot of stuff that I didn't even know about.  The thing is her aunt wrote most of the emails to me, and she said that was because her aunt thought that she would screw it up if she were to write because of her limited English skills, so I can kind of see the reasoning even though it was flawed.  And I spent 10 days there and not once did she show any sign that she didn't want to be with me, in fact it was the complete opposite.  And it was that way for the first 3 or 4 years of marriage.  There were times I had to push her away because it was just too intense, I wasn't used to it.  So it's not like I had any clue that she wasn't into me, if in fact that is the truth (I really don't know what to think about that one).  But human trafficking?  No, not even close.

The very easy questions are:

What made you file a petition and decide to marry her when you know the woman isn't in agreement with it?

Was the transaction made as payment for the sole purpose of marrying the woman despite her very obvious show of discontent and signs of being coerced into the marriage?

$1,000.00 payable in 7 (equal) payments? They probably would've taken even less?

If human trafficking is out of the question, would immigration fraud be applicable?

[jone]

How do you reconcile the above with "..it was all lies..."

Rather difficult for someone to pull of a feat of sheer acting genius for such an extended period, don't you think?

Seems more like it was a genuine relationship that went south. It happens. The key for you would be to take responsibility for and learn from mistakes you made which assisted that relationship on its southerly course so you don't make the ultimate blunder of repetition with this one. Shoot for new and improved mistakes. 

Aw, Dad,

Glad you're home.

[BillyB]

Which brings us back to:

Vinnvinny's quote: "... The moral of yours and other tales is guys should date a lady for at least 2 years before making any commitment. Whilst some might disagree I will add in support of my position that it’s worked well for me, I’ve yet to be divorced from a FSU woman."

 If a Western man told an FSU women he will not start the k-1 paperwork in less than two years, I think most FSU women would dump him instead of waiting up to 3 years between first date and living with him in his country. If guy needs at least two years to figure somebody out, chances are he's not capable of figuring anybody out. I'm glad it worked out for Vinnvinny but it's going to get a lot of men dumped if they told women they won't be able to decide on marriage until 2 years after the first date.


Some people can read people better than others and can make an educated decision on whether to take a relationship to the next level or walk away in much less time. Jmana and his ex wife were young when they married. Jmana had 6 years and his ex had one year living life as adults. We can't expect them to make the best decisions to shape their lives at that stage. I hope both of them make wiser decisions in the future.

[jone]

I couldn't imagine marrying someone so young.