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Author Topic: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.  (Read 72546 times)

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Offline GQBlues

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #150 on: July 30, 2018, 05:15:02 PM »
I feel for you, Newbs..LOL! Some of these threads are too funny if not downright painful to read.

Dating FSUWs is no different than dating western women. If anything, considering favorable MOB advantages afforded WM, it is (or should be) much, much easier. Some had even pegged this pursuit *fishing in a barrel* before. If some of you are having a tough time at this juncture, dare I say the real challenge then is being true to yourself. Period. Just own up to the fact that the problem lies with YOU. Work on that/yourself and you'd be much better for it.

It has little to nothing to do with your 'approach' - or more importantly, women.

WOVO have their respective following, as do WMVM. If you do not have the personality to do one or the either, don't. It's tough enough as it is to be so outside your surrounding and environment when you get there without having to try to do something you just don't have the personality to do. As with so many of you, you try to compensate for these failings by leading with your money, only to end up broke with nothing to show for it.

I'm a WMVM guy. My mojo had always been, how do you know you made the right choice if you never had choices to begin with? After all, a WMVM is WOVO waiting to happen.
 
Mind you, these were all before Skype/Messenger/WhatsApp, etc...Yet, I never wasted my time writing drivels and letters to each of the women. Sh1t, are you guys nuts?!? The whole get-to-know chapter happens, as it should, AFTER I met (you meet) the gals in person and if it's warranted. My time, my rules. Period. I can write an entire book how each of the gals were anxious for my upcoming trip. No BS. So much so, THEY call me here in L.A. Or be always at home when *I* call. Some even send packages to me. Some, months later after I had already committed myself to my present wife, were still trying to keep in contact - just in case. One gal even wrote me an email 4 years after I got married just to see how everything is. She had apparently married an American and moved to the east coast but the marriage apparently didn't work out.

Additionally, I never subscribe to all these *FSUWs are yada, yada, yada...* Men who say that run short with their social calendar..

Sure, I was superficial in the women I chose at first contact, why not? You don't know any of these ladies to be in a position to make any other choices. We/I then refined that process of selection through natural progression. I invested 3 months before I went. It was a one-shot deal for me. Living and enjoying life at home was still a very viable option for me. Women are women the world over. So I wasn't planning on wasting my time with this anymore than I planned to. I still dated at home through that 3 months time, though not seriously.

There is *nothing* on this board that can help your cause more than YOU can *honestly* do for yourself. Just take a little bite of reality, is all. Just be honest with the gals, yourself and who you are. Then just let the chips fall where they may. You can't force fit this experience.
« Last Edit: July 30, 2018, 05:18:30 PM by GQBlues »
My wonderful rebuttal to the Prague Spring thread is now *relocated* again (being actively hidden, lol) in *Anything Goes* section, titled: Willy Waving. Hurry before she deletes it altogether. LMAO! Enjoy.

Offline ML

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #151 on: July 30, 2018, 06:29:32 PM »
Pretty sound advice GQ.
Winston Churchill.  “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”

Online 2tallbill

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #152 on: July 30, 2018, 07:55:34 PM »
Gotcha !! ))

How many years has it been since you were dating?

5 years
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Kiss the girl, don't ask her first.

Online msmob

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #153 on: July 31, 2018, 12:36:12 AM »
As typical, you are rearranging to suit your purpose.

You are mistaken

I did not 'rearrange', nor is it a pattern, sir !

Your explanation - despite your 'clarification' - IMHO suggested fun meant lots of sexual encounters whilst you had not intention of settling down - right ?

'Good faith' ?




Online msmob

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #154 on: July 31, 2018, 12:41:38 AM »


Sure, I was superficial in the women I chose at first contact, why not?

....



 Just be honest with the gals, yourself and who you are.

Hmm, does not this advice conflict ?

BTW, I was thinking I would be eating some serious humble pie re Tiger's performance at The Open .. It was great to see him competing to win, but I was glad for Molinari   


Offline GQBlues

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #155 on: August 01, 2018, 01:12:31 PM »
Hmm, does not this advice conflict ?..


Not for me. By 'superficial', I meant choosing simply based on 'looks'. After all, there really isn't much to go by when one looks at a profile beyond the photos since I don't buy much of what those 'canned' profile say. She looks cute. Now let's find out the person behind it.

As for honesty, I tell them my intent on the intro letter and afford them the option to say 'yeay' or 'nay' - respectfully. I state my point and reinforced it by saying that I more than encouraged them to be open to meet as many men as well, locally or otherwise, until such point we meet in person and be able make a rational decision if there will be reasons to continue, get to know each other better, and eventually - if we're compatible to pursue anything further.

I don't mind competition. Matter of fact, I not only like it, I prefer and encourage it. It assures me the gal have a sound basis for her life changing decision. As do I.

I don't do back-ups, I didn't lie, nor did I conceal my intentions as many men here advice newbies to do.

To me, these are all chance meetings. Natural progression. My get-to-know period happens AFTER the chance meeting, not before. had I come back home without any reason to pursue, I would've been comfortable with that as there are options at home and elsewhere.
« Last Edit: August 01, 2018, 01:14:35 PM by GQBlues »
My wonderful rebuttal to the Prague Spring thread is now *relocated* again (being actively hidden, lol) in *Anything Goes* section, titled: Willy Waving. Hurry before she deletes it altogether. LMAO! Enjoy.

Online Trenchcoat

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #156 on: August 01, 2018, 01:35:06 PM »

Mind you, these were all before Skype/Messenger/WhatsApp, etc...Yet, I never wasted my time writing drivels and letters to each of the women. Sh1t, are you guys nuts?!? The whole get-to-know chapter happens, as it should, AFTER I met (you meet) the gals in person and if it's warranted. My time, my rules. Period. I can write an entire book how each of the gals were anxious for my upcoming trip. No BS. So much so, THEY call me here in L.A. Or be always at home when *I* call. Some even send packages to me. Some, months later after I had already committed myself to my present wife, were still trying to keep in contact - just in case. One gal even wrote me an email 4 years after I got married just to see how everything is. She had apparently married an American and moved to the east coast but the marriage apparently didn't work out.


Did they know you were rich already and living in LA? ;D

For me I would not do it this way, I agree on not writing drivels but building a bit of rapport before visiting can pay dividends and help avoid flake outs. This is what I learned form my trip to Lviv where I tried to meet girls on the hoof, ok I messed up a bit in pre-correspondence and it wasnt pre-coresspondence before the trip but all the same. I felt I was taking a shot in the dark meeting with these girls and they probably felt just the same or worse.

By the same token I can see that a lot of time can be wasted on writing drivels for months onlt to find the girl was not right. Sure if the right questions are asked a lot can be garnered but if it doesn't work out its a lot of labour time and effort writing & skyping. So I think somewhere between the two approaches might well be the best place to head for and generally that is what I'm doing at the moment.

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #157 on: August 01, 2018, 02:03:30 PM »
... So I think somewhere between the two approaches might well be the best place to head for and generally that is what I'm doing at the moment.


...and that's where you need to exercise your wits and creative self to separate yourself and stand out from the herd. What I did worked wonders.
My wonderful rebuttal to the Prague Spring thread is now *relocated* again (being actively hidden, lol) in *Anything Goes* section, titled: Willy Waving. Hurry before she deletes it altogether. LMAO! Enjoy.

Online msmob

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #158 on: August 02, 2018, 12:49:39 AM »

Not for me. By 'superficial', I meant choosing simply based on 'looks'.

thanks for the clarification

Online Trenchcoat

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #159 on: August 17, 2018, 06:23:53 PM »
ML, just curious to know on this one, what was your initial criteria on which the seems 1000 women were selected?

Online DaveNY

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #160 on: August 17, 2018, 07:10:51 PM »

Dating FSUWs is no different than dating western women. If anything, considering favorable MOB advantages afforded WM, it is (or should be) much, much easier. Some had even pegged this pursuit *fishing in a barrel* before. If some of you are having a tough time at this juncture, dare I say the real challenge then is being true to yourself. Period. Just own up to the fact that the problem lies with YOU. Work on that/yourself and you'd be much better for it.


WM may have had an advantage in the 90s when Russia was just coming out of communism or when Russia went into a bad recession but now, at least in the major cities, IMO WM do not have an advantage over RM. In fact WM are probably at a disadvantage. There are many reasons for this, some are:

Most WM who visit Russia don't speak Russian or Ukrainian or any of the local languages.

Many FSUW believe WM are simply sex tourists. This notion has been widely promoted by the Russian and Ukrainian governments for at least the last 15 years.

FSUW know that WM are generally not going to be in country for longer than a few weeks. In fact the vast majority of WM who write FSUW never travel to any FSU country. FSUM live there permanently.

I agree that there is nothing that makes FSUW substantially superior to women from other countries however they do have a culture different from the US, UK and other western countries. WM do not understand this culture, of course FSUM do.

Most WM will never learn Russian or other FSU languages well enough to converse on even a conversational level. Learn her language learn her culture. By learning her language you learn her culture, at least to some degree.

I always advise men who want to meet women from a non English speaking to learn her language. I've never meet a foreign woman who said she wished her husband didn't understand her language and culture so well. Met plenty of foreign women who said her husband needs to learn her language.   

With respect to your potential wife's culture. Many American men know if you marry a Filippino woman you will probably be sending money to her family. The same MAY be true of FSUW. Some families of FSUW believe in this others don't. YMMW.

Most FSUW love their country. They are not going to instantly love your country and even after decades there may still prefer their birth country. There's no getting around this.

A couple of years ago my wife and I were at an anniversary party. The couple were an Ukrainian woman and an American man who were celebrating their tenth.

I had been talking to one of the men who left to get a refill and started to listen to a conversation my wife and 5 other women were having. The topic of conversation, would you return to your country if your husband died? One of the women was from China the others were all FSUW. The only woman who would go home was from Kazakhstan. 

She was from a small town outside of Aktau and found NYC crowded. They didn't have children. All the other women wanted to stay. All had children and were or had been employed. You should not extrapolate this to include all American men/FSUW marriages. Again YMMV. 

Offline ML

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #161 on: August 17, 2018, 08:31:26 PM »
ML, just curious to know on this one, what was your initial criteria on which the seems 1000 women were selected?

Every man can be different, so not much value in knowing what another's criteria was.

But anyway, I screened on:
Age range
Height range
Weight range which I had to do separately for each height, so time consuming.
Some English
No smoking
No or moderate drinking
Minimum bachelors degree

And yes, what they posted regarding above isn't always correct, but I didn't find any serious discrepancies with the gals I ended up spending a lot of time with.

Unlike many other guys here, I didn't pay too much attention to photos as they often might not give correct situation, and most of the gals in Ukraine are not too bad looking anyway.  I am more of a body man than a face man.  There were only a few that I met that were 'butt ugly.'  Even those, I treated decently and kept meeting as short as possible.
Winston Churchill.  “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”

Online 2tallbill

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #162 on: October 29, 2018, 05:38:44 PM »
I copied the information below from a post that GQBlues took the effort to post
in another thread. I posted it here so it wouldn't be lost.

See below

The premise in all of this is you're pursuing the FSU scene with marriage as an underlying possibility/probability (as oppose to merely getting laid - not saying you are). This doesn't negate anything you accustomed yourself into doing socially. Everything is a process regardless which approach is taken. Thus, proceed with a process that's 'trusted', comfortable and natural to you. Geography or culture doesn't change that, IMO. Doing things differently only means you're being someone you're not to suit a temporary 'fix'. That'll just get you in trouble in the long run. Guaranteed.

So, let me share with you what I did. I will only speak of myself as I only know what I can do. Not implying you do the same..Here goes:

I made up my mind to give this route one shot. Like you, I had options at home and everywhere else, so the FSU was just one of the options. The best thing for me to handle this was so much more different than what everyone seem to have done based on what they shared of their experiences. That's OK with me as I stayed true to myself by sticking to my 'norm'. I am not overwhelmed in the presence of gorgeous women. I don't give a hoot who. I've been used to it all my life. So I maintained presence of mind regardless of situations.

Then:

1. I susbcribed to EM with their then-early mailers of 'upcoming' list of women before they appeared in their website.
2. First email is short and sweet (content in both language/subject header in Russian). Two photos attached. Basic introduction. My intent and premise - the opportunity to meet in person (given estimated time of my trip).
3. Encouraged them to meet as many men as they like, as I plan to do the same with FSUWs, which also included me still dating women here at home. Period. Some said, no way, so I remained gracious and respectful for those who responded 'nay' and thanked them for their honesty. Others agreed with me (you'd be surprised how many 'agreed apprehensively. Few readily. Plenty nonetheless).
4. w/ English language knowledge only. Fluency is not necessary.

Here's where I may have done something few, if none, did the same. With 2-3 months before my trip, and being a WMVM, I didn't want to be burdened with a barrage of emails/phone calls with numerous women before the trip. That's a waste of time and energy. For me, I feel there should NOT be any emotional connection during this time. I'll get to know the person AFTER we meet and acknowledged that by then an opportunity of getting to know each other better is warranted. So how do I accomplish this?

2002-2003 was before Skype/Facebook/most Social media...so I had to be creative, do something that will separate me from everyone else, but also somehow maintain continued interest without laboring the process and writing redundant emails for so many gals for the entire 2-3 months.

So what I did is this: at the time, there was a website (webcrawler, IIRC) that offered a 'free', limited webpage. 4 pages. So I took the 'free' offer.

1st page: Intro, the genesis of why I'm pursuing FSU, a small tidbit of who I am and where I live and a good sized picture of me.
2nd page: pictures page (update per your mood), of you, w/ friends, places you've been to, in essence it'll be like they're there with you and sees the things you're seeing; (Eventually, my 2nd page became a mirror of the first page but written in Russian and with a different picture - there's a story of how that came to be).
3rd page: postings of recent events in my life (nothing personal). Could be anything random. It's like telling a friend your day, sports you played, general recent experiences (update per your mood);
4th page: a little bit of history about you re: childhood, trips, notable achievements, favorites things to do; etc...(update per your mood). I did most of these in a story-telling fashion. Allow their imagination to kick in. I tried to be as creative as I could. After all, the mind is, eherm, the biggest 'organ' you know.

The cool thing was, you actually get your 'own' weblink that you provide to those who took your offer. Doing this once, actually sends a universal notices to the gals every time you entered an update. There's also an added little 'cool' page hit counter, too. LOL, you'd know how many times your webpage got visited. Definitely an awesome and fun bonus for the ego. It's amazing how much intrigue and compliments I was continually receiving from all the gals - day 1. I was taken aback by the page hits because it didn't seem to justify the number of the gals I was in contact with. It was relatively enormous and couldn't really make sense why until I found out many of the gals were sharing the link with family, friends, etc...

I can tell you amazing things that happened to every single gal because of that webpage. Each one is an amazing story unto itself because of it. It was the gals themselves that pushed for more so much so they're calling me in L.A., send me text messages, sending me gifts, snail mail with cool stuff, etc...These were all pretty expensive to do from Russia at the time. The effect was incredible.

By the time I made my trip, I was almost a rock star with each one of them. Of course now you have Facebook/Instagram, etc..So you'll need to get ahead of these curve in the same way I did for me at the time. There's more than one way to skin a cat. This is just one of them, and one I chose to do...

Do what you believe works for you. Do not COMPROMISE yourself and your belief. Be your own man!
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Kiss the girl, don't ask her first.

Offline ML

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #163 on: October 30, 2018, 08:21:33 PM »
I searched back in my old trip report to get my wording on this matter.

Here is what I wrote concerning my WMVM trips:

"Further, all of the women I met knew I was meeting with other women.  Did I specifically tell them?  No I did not.  But, in emails before we met, I told in very strong language that I would under no circumstances discuss other women past, present or future, and I would not ask questions about other men past, present or future.

In coy terms, many of the women made slight reference to 'other women.'  I ignored such comments, and none of the women pressed the issue.  But they knew; just because they were not stupid.

And, I am not so stupid as to slap the women in the face by telling them I will choose based on 'how they play their cards.'  Again, I don't have to tell them, because as intelligent women; they already know this."
Winston Churchill.  “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”

Online msmob

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #164 on: October 30, 2018, 11:57:02 PM »
What you don't say, is how many women who 'dared' to raise your 'no,no' subject list  met you again ;)

If they were 'smart', I mean ...


Offline ML

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #165 on: November 10, 2018, 11:38:05 AM »
Periodically there are complaints that my original list is out of date:


OK you 'up to date guys'  please provide a listing of those sites in my original listing that are not even around anymore.

Complaints without solutions are not very productive.

Then, we can see if a moderator can go into the thread and delete those.
Winston Churchill.  “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.”

Online msmob

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #166 on: November 10, 2018, 11:47:09 AM »
Can I suggest that mamba.ru is removed ?

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #167 on: November 10, 2018, 02:37:32 PM »
It is funny reading here about some posts describing their 'style' in pursuing FSU women years ago.


Intro letters, pages 1,2,3 ? Writing emails? It is mostly now about conversations on apps on phones with video when possible. Every year English language and western culture is more ingrained into society in FSU.

More and more girls are on Facebook and Instagram. I don't bother with vk anymore.
Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #168 on: November 10, 2018, 03:02:33 PM »
It is funny reading here about some posts describing their 'style' in pursuing FSU women years ago.


What style have you used to successfully catch women and get one to accept a marriage proposal?

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #169 on: November 10, 2018, 03:36:24 PM »
It is funny reading here about some posts describing their 'style' in pursuing FSU women years ago.


Intro letters, pages 1,2,3 ? Writing emails? It is mostly now about conversations on apps on phones with video when possible. Every year English language and western culture is more ingrained into society in FSU.

More and more girls are on Facebook and Instagram. I don't bother with vk anymore.

I know you are one person that has agreed frequently with  me about guys persisting in handing out very dated "advice"
It does not seem to matter to some that they continue doing it -- and then scream they are "helping" guys.

Things change in the world - sometimes quickly. Viber went from nothing to everything in a very short time is an example.Sure -the principle is the same as Skype -- but Skype never had the all encompassing penetration via the spread of the smartphone age -- it changed a lot in a short time.

Instead of guys with yesteryear exposure getting cut when it is pointed out -- they should learn from it an adapt a principle of "their" time on the ground . As an example of a really entertaining ( but from an earlier time)e  TR of Donholio which still deals with the basics of relationships . The actual methodolgy is only relevant today in the widest terms.

What style have you used to successfully catch women and get one to accept a marriage proposal?

Now -here is Silly Billy at it again- his response is to attempt to claim so higher knowledge based on his "success" as he wants us to believe. Silly is an example of a guy who persists in rationalising what amounts to BS-even when it was current-- which was a long time ago.
Only a fool would take his "advice"
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 translated as: Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the heroes!!!  is a Ukrainian greeting slogan being used now all over Ukraine to signify support for a free independent Ukraine

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #170 on: November 10, 2018, 03:53:19 PM »
Dmnotify and Ukrainedate worked for me.  Scrolled through various women's profiles, wrote an introductory message to those that seemed interesting, got replies, messaged back and forth, then moved onto chatting via WhatsApp and Skype.

Started in Feb of this year, 2018.  I'm in my late 40's, searched for women who were 34-44 (give or take), indicated they wouldn't mind relocating to another country, and had at least limited English (not basic - one step above).

About 50% responded, and after a couple of messages focussed on half of that.  Narrowed the choice to 6 women after a month.  Visited Ms. T in Ukraine, hit the jackpot.


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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #171 on: November 10, 2018, 04:00:33 PM »
"About 50% responded,"

I had the same success rate in Kyiv, just talking to women I randomly met, and then inviting them for a coffee, then dinner and apartment
I was 40, and picking up women 19-28, all 9-10 looking, super beautiful, gorgeous...
this past summer was in Crimea
still super easy to meet women
same old pickup lines still work

the more things change
THE MORE THEY REMAIN THE SAME
вы думаете, что любой из этих людей, даже российских, подозревает, что я русский?

вот как я могу создать американскую личность
Я могу взять напрокат

Online LAman

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #172 on: November 10, 2018, 04:03:59 PM »
What style have you used to successfully catch women and get one to accept a marriage proposal?


For one thing 'successful' can have many meanings and interpreted many ways. It is an individual assessment. To me, a 'successful' marriage lasts 40-50 years until one passes. To others it is a 'good' 5- 10 years. I catch women all the time, big deal. I don't settle like some, it takes time to find someone you feel is right. Sometimes you never find that person, sometimes you do and it ends up a LTR only. To me marriage is a BIG thing, not taken lightly.


I cringe when I hear the word 'success' here. When dealing with relationships, emotions, feelings, thoughts... what is success or failure? How is it measured? It either works out or not. In relationships, two people decide what will be.
Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift

Online LAman

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #173 on: November 10, 2018, 04:13:07 PM »
"About 50% responded,"

I had the same success rate in Kyiv, just talking to women I randomly met, and then inviting them for a coffee, then dinner and apartment
I was 40, and picking up women 19-28, all 9-10 looking, super beautiful, gorgeous...
this past summer was in Crimea
still super easy to meet women
same old pickup lines still work

the more things change
THE MORE THEY REMAIN THE SAME


What do you mean the same pick up lines still work??? You mean you took them for coffee, then dinner and back to your apt?? What did Mrs Krimster have to say?


You know God created the world Mon-Fri. For the women, on Sat he created BillyB and on Sun created Krimster!! 

I am surprised you two left any women on earth for the rest of us 'normal' guys!!
Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift

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Re: Pursuing FSUW 101. The procedures and the dating websites.
« Reply #174 on: November 10, 2018, 04:20:12 PM »

What do you mean the same pick up lines still work??? You mean you took them for coffee, then dinner and back to your apt?? What did Mrs Krimster have to say?


You know God created the world Mon-Fri. For the women, on Sat he created BillyB and on Sun created Krimster!! 

I am surprised you two left any women on earth for the rest of us 'normal' guys!!

Some guys live their dreams, some live in their dreams...
Multitasking means screwing up several things at once.

 

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